Friday, September 7, 2007

An old friend

I found out this afternoon that an old friend of mine passed away yesterday. Although I was never as close to him as I have been to others, his untimely death is incredibly sad and I am so very sorry that it has happened.

Upon ending my sophomore year at high school in NYC, I was asked by the administration to leave that school (since I was never there, cutting class, and thus taking up a spot that could be used by a more deserving child). Frustrated and fed up with my delinquency, I was moved to upstate NY, to New Paltz. I spent the summer there, bored, knowing no one. In September I boarded the school bus on my road, and soon after met Jay. I was a punk rocker freaky kid, 16 years old, and he was a skater freaky kid, in my grade. We hit it off immediately, and after school, on one of those first days, we hung out. He introduced me to his group of friends in NP, and I was welcomed into the fold.

Although I grew closer to some other friends, Jay and I continued to run in the same circle, and were always in the same places, sitting around together and just hanging out.

In January of that junior year of high school, I dropped out. I moved to other places, but as my parents have a house there, and my close friends were there, I continued to visit. For a long time I still spent a lot of time with him and other friends up there. As the years went by and my closer friends moved away, I stopped seeing Jay and others up there; I lost my connection through my close, more permanent friends, who know everyone better than I do. But I still saw Jay when those close friends were in town.

The last time I saw him was last year, at an old bar that we used to all go to. Because I have moved around a lot, I have always been paranoid that people wouldn't remember me as time has passed. But over the last 13 years, including last year's meeting at the bar, Jay always remembered me, and always talked to me like nothing had changed, time had not passed.

Jay was one of the nicest people I think I ever encountered. He was always so nice to me, and friendly and welcoming, always. He was also very funny. I was talking to my husband earlier about Jay. Luckily my husband had met him on several occasions and has experienced some of my fondest and funniest memories of him, which are probably too risque/controversial to write here. But that was one of the best things about Jay, and I'm so truly sorry that I won't be able to experience more of him.



  1. Aw, babe, I'm so sorry. That just sucks.

  2. :( That's sad to hear, but it's incredibly touching to see that you had the time to become such close friends. I'm sure some people live for decades without such connection. *hugs across the net*